That’s state fair. No, county fair, no, that’s… Have you ever seen the way Filipino families throw huge parties for their kids? Like, two hundred people come over to watch a dude whose eyes can’t focus drool onto a slice of pie, which sounds an awful lot like my average breakfast now that you don’t mention it (drool and pie yum!), and celebrate the mother and father but really the mother surviving that first year. Honestly I’ve been a little jealous as soon as I learned about the cultural tradition, as the most I ever got did for my birthday was someone burnt a hotel. Okay that kind of is a lot. Well okay we were at a hotel fire and threw an impromptu gig, calming a panicky crowd and were given a promise that we could come back and book some for free if we ever wanted. I really should take them up on that, those rooms are expensive and not in the United States.

But anyways this bullshit up there looks like the chintzy end of the fourth birthday party a rich Filipino family threw for their two year old that year.